The Electric Mule--Foreign Correspondent

Dear Friends:   If this message is incoherent, I must be forgiven in advance. I am in the 'high' Himalayan country of Nepal, where the thin air and the effects of ganga smoke wafting everywhere (ganga smoke is just like ganja smoke only spelled differently since we are closer to India), produces hallucinatory FX which makes one's grasp of reality tenuous.  But heh?  Who has grasp on reality these days?  Wall Street Bankers?  Polar Bears?  Iceland?  To survive in this world, it is obvious that one must become a shape shifterer and clever as a crow.

To get back to reality, George Orwell stated that writers (and artists) write and paint for the following reasons:   1. Sheer egotism- the desire to be clever, to be talked about, to be remembered after death. 2. Historical impulse- the desire to see things as they are, to find out true facts and store them for posterity 3. Political purposes- in the broadest sense, the desire to push the world in a certain direction, and to alter people's ideas regarding society.   I stand GUILTY of all of the above!   Tomiyo and I were last in Nepal and Kathmandu for one month in 1990, videotaping Tibetans living in exile around a stupa in Bodhnath, a settlement just outside of town.  Since then, EVERTHING about Nepal, Kathmandu, and Bodhnath has changed beyond recognition.  In the past 20 years the population of Nepal has increased from 16 million to 32 million (an unofficial number supplied to me by an NGO).  Youth have flooded in from the countryside as the result of the Marxist Maoist insurgency of the past 15 years.  As a result, the environment of Kathmandu is INSANE!!!  There are 6 hours of electrical power every day- in a country with tremendous hydro power potential.  Nepal is caught between a rock and a hard place i.e. between the giants of India and China.  So life is difficult.   Walking the streets of Kathmandu is an EXTREMELY dangerous enterprise. There are no rules.  Motorcycles driven by young men with power between their legs, little Suzuki taxis, and bicycle pedalled rickshaws, come at you from all directions at all times.  One has a very good chance of being clipped by one or all of the above and then sent flying, while the perpetrator speeds off to another 'death-tin-nation'.  And in the evening, FORGET IT!  As the Rolling Stones said at the end of one of their songs: 'when you are on your bike at night, wear white!'  The Nepalis have a femae ghost they called 'Kichi Kini'.  She is a beautiful and sexually insatiable siren who is recognizeable by her sagging breasts and feet going backward (kinda like Lot's wife,).  Obviously Kichi Kini has never seen Bob Dylan's movie "Don't Look Back'.  When I walk on Kathmandu's streets at night, I feel like I am being pursued by Kichi Kini- who the Nepalis tell me only go after gerry-yak-tricks like me!    As a result, Tomiyo and I have taken to hiring rickshaws pedalled by tired old men- figuring that at least we are giving them some work, and if we get hit by a motorcycle or car, a bicycle spoke thru the heart is a fast way to go!  Also their calls to the tourists are ingratiating, such as: 'this rickshaw go too fast', or 'come ride on my baby helicopter', or 'ride my Nepali Mercedes'.   Then there are the restaurant menus from places like 'The Big Belly':   1 Beef bourguignonne (or something like that!)- cooked diced with bloody wine smile 2 Fish schnitzel- beef cutlet coded with bread comb and fried 3.Mix Veg Salad- to seed in mayonnaise (grow yer own at the table maybe?) 4.Chinese section: Chopusey- cripsy fried nodules WE GUARANTEE ALL THE VEGETABLES ARE WASHING IN IODINE!!!   Reading in the Kathmandu paper last week, I discovered that there is a mad French Canadian running around loose- drunk and with a machete, who is attacking mongrel dogs on the street.  Since both Hindus and Buddhists revere life in all of its forms (well, some of the time anyway- as long as it ain't human life!), and the Buddhist believe that dogs are reincarnations of 'bad monks', these attacks are not exactly smiled upon.  The authorities have not caught the culprit as yet, but some tourists have described him to the police and apparently he went after tourists who tried to stop him.  Obviously the guy was suffering from attitude sickness- which affects some people in mountain regions.   Tomiyo and I were outside of Kathmandu at the Buddhist stupa at Bodhnath.  Around the stupa are numerous tourist joints, thanka painting shops, cafes, etc.  I wanted to buy some 'medical thankas', just for my own purposes, because they are so weird and strange graphically.  I picked some at one shop and the sales people quoted me a price waaay too high.  I told them:  'there is pure art, there is pure religion, there is the selling of art, there is the selling of religion'.  I told them that I lived in New York in the art world for 33 years and I can tell the selling of art when I see it'.  They still wouldn't budge on the price.  So, I told them that Buddha's first sermon, 'the fire sermon' at Sarnath, outside of Varanasi in India, he stated that all of mankind's problems are based on desire, and that once desire is put aside, all problems vanish.  I told them: 'I no longer desire these thankas', and I walked away.  The price immediately dropped by 1/3 and I bought the thankas.  Bartering is a nasty, and tricky business and sometimes one has to pull out the big guns of religion, philosophy, etc. (at least I do!).  Of course, they still made money off me so everybody is happy- cuz I asked them if they were happy, and they said they were.   Finally, we were in a fair trade shop called 'Mahaghuti' which pays fair wages to crafts people etc.  While Tomiyo was looking at merchandise, I was telling some of the staff a true story about Japanese sales girls in the 1920's who refused to jump out of a building which was on fire and were burned to death, because no panties are worn under sik kimonos because it destroys 'the line', which can be seen thru the silk kimono (it's called 'death before dishonour').  A salesgirl at Mahaghuti by the name of Mamata had told us that she was recently married within the past month.  When I finished my story about the Japanese women, I said: 'don't worry- Tomiyo wears panties'.  Everybody laughed but Mamata, who put her head down like a good Hindu wife and her face turned red.  I told her that its OK: 'an old person like myself can say anything they like'.  She laughed.  Then we found out that she had been married 20 days earlier in an arranged marriage, after meeting her husband once- one year before.  Then she confided that the marriage had not been consommated under Nepali Hindu tradition and that after a 20 day period he would be coming back to Kathmandu from the countryside this weekend.  I told her I found her account highly embarrassing.  Everybody- including Mamata laughed.  Actually, I find many people in the so-called 3rd World hipper to my word play than some of my compatriots in the West. Many of these people have never studied English in school and have picked up their comprehension from dealing with Western tourists.  So, when they laugh, they are either laughing with me or laughing at me.  Who cares?  Laughter makes the world go round.  It beats bombing and invasions!

Back to New Delhi for 20 days, where the temperature is running between 105-110 degrees Farenheit.  Should be fun!  Aux reservoir!

The Electric Eel

copyright Ernest Gusella 2009